Losing My Income Was Scary - Carer Money Matters Helped Me Stay Afloat
This is a stock image as Anita wishes to stay anonymous
My name is Anita and I am a carer for my eldest daughter and my dad.
I have two daughters, aged 11 and 18. My eldest has autism and finds things like controlling her emotions, social skills, living independently, and getting medical support really hard.
Education has been really difficult for her, and some days she would phone me crying and I had to drop everything to support her whilst in crisis. It’s been tough on my younger daughter, and I often wish I could give her more of my time and energy.
Before this, I was a carer for my mum when she was very unwell. As her health deteriorated, I was missing more and more days at work to care for her. When she passed away, it took a huge toll on my dad’s mental health, so I started supporting him too. He lives an hour away and I visit him regularly to make sure he’s okay.
All of this was happening while I was also working 30 hours a week in a job supporting carers. It was a really mentally demanding role and I’d been trying to keep everything going. But in November 2024, after one particularly traumatic case at work, it all became too much.
My mental health completely broke down. I was diagnosed with PTSD and had to stop working. I just couldn’t cope anymore.
That’s when the financial pressure really hit. I suddenly had no income, and no ability to work but my daughters and my dad were all depending on me. I remember thinking: “I have no idea what to do. I still need to pay bills. How are we going to survive?”
It was strange and difficult to accept that I was now the one in need of support. Until then, I’d always been the person helping others. But I remembered the carers I’d supported in similar situations, and the organisations in the area that I’d direct them to.
That’s when I remembered the work of Carers Plus Yorkshire and reached out to Ali and Tara in the team.
I knew I was a carer, but I’d never fully understood what that meant in terms of support available to me. That changed after my first appointment.
Carers Plus Yorkshire helped me access financial support through their Carer Money Matters programme. For example, they gave me information on how to apply for Personal Independence Payments (PIP).
They also showed me how, if I was successful, I could access further financial support, information on financial grants and schemes and even priority access for energy providers.
I was really surprised at the amount of support available. Despite working in the same sector, I hadn’t known about so many of these ways for supporting carers.
They also told me about the Carers Grant which supports carers with whatever they need.
I always dreamed of having a garden nook which is a covered space where I could take a break. Thanks to the Carers Grant, I received £400 towards a garden sofa set, giving me a private respite space right outside my back door.
If I’m successful in receiving PIP and Employment Support Allowance it means I will have more of a financial safety net and fewer worries about returning to work before I’m ready. It gives me the time I need to recover from PTSD.
And it means I can be there for my eldest daughter, who’s currently job-hunting, as well as my dad. He really needs my support to help him emotionally through his grief.
After getting the support I needed – and when I wanted it - the constant worry has lifted. I also know where to turn if we need more help.
At a recent drop-in session, Ali and Tara even offered to put my youngest in touch with young carers services, which was a huge relief. She’s been affected a lot by my PTSD, and I want her to feel supported too.
For any carers who are in a similar position, my advice is to bite the bullet and ask for help. It can feel daunting, but it opens up a world of support that you wouldn’t have considered otherwise.
I tried to carry everything on my own for far too long, and that’s why I reached breaking point. Whatever you do, please don’t wait until that happens. Remember, there’s help out there.
Thanks to Carers Plus Yorkshire, not only have I been able to access financial support all in one place, but I’m also looking forward to joining other carers for crafting classes when I feel ready. It means so much to know I will have peer support from other carers and the reassurance that comes from knowing I’m not alone.
Carers Plus Yorkshire is a charity covering Scarborough, Whitby, Ryedale, Hambleton & Richmondshire, providing free and confidential advice for unpaid carers.
Carer Money Matters provides information and practical support to unpaid carers on ways to increase their household income. Carer Money Matters services are being delivered by Carers Trust’s network of local carer organisations in 24 areas across England, Scotland and Wales.
Each service is tailored to the specific needs of carers in the local community,
offering guidance that’s relevant, practical, and connected to trusted specialist partners in the area.
