Isolation - by George Somers

they ask

“how do you cope?”

and before you can begin to think up an answer

they say

“you're amazing, I could never do that”

it makes you wonder

how they see your role

what they think you do

with those few words dedicated to you

they move on

talk about their life

you just listen

knowing your answer would’ve taken more time than anyone has

because, to be honest, you don’t cope

not as well as they think anyway


now is not the time for that to be unpacked

so you just smile and say

“thank you, I appreciate that”

when, really, what you want to explain is:

caring isn't easy, not a walk in the park

takes dedication, determination

to keep going and helping until it feels I’ve fallen apart

giving every piece of myself, every kind word, every smile

to the one I care for

to my friends

even to my annoying little brother

never leave a thing for myself

locked away

with only me for company

and how is it

that I can make anyone feel better and yet

I only ever feel I’m by myself

alone and cold with no where to go

deep down I know it isn't true

but then again

it's so difficult to find me when I’ve hidden for so long

hoping they don’t see I’ve just pretended all is well and nothing is wrong

played the ‘I'm fine card’ a million times

in order to disguise how I’ve really been

Uno reverse when people ask how I am

'cause I'd rather hear their problems than share my own

scared of being a burden, of ridicule

so instead I share home

with isolation

who is a close friend

almost relative

one that never goes anywhere without me

nor does isolation party alone because

loneliness, boredom and fear are commonly known

to hang together in a grey clouded group of misery

stick to my mind like glue

take over my heart

throws the rhythm, slows it right down

so it beats off sync with everyone else around me

obviously different

and if they notice I’m struggling they'll say

“keep your chin up!”

but how can I?

when my head is so full of to-dos

which cause ‘sorry I can’t do'

so heavy on my shoulders

already carrying the weight of my world

I burden myself

not easing any strain

I continue to isolate my heart from my sleeve



as to what they might see

if I showed them my heart

let them peek at my mind

they may find

me, the true me

not the one who hides behind

what I think they want me to be

but the real me

the one who has fought and won

battled and lost

the one who hasn't given up

defeat after defeat I got back on my feet

but I am worn and tired and scared

I need help and support 

someone to care for me

as I know I deserve the care I so willingly give to others